From Bad to Worse

My God do I need a break. I honestly think it's my depression that is causing me to be like this and then when things go from bad to worse to further beyond, I just cant handle it.

Last night my youngest daughter was up past 1:00 am because she refused to sleep despite everything I did to get her to bed... since around 7:00 pm. Then my husband got pissed off and left me in the house with our 2 year old that refused to go to bed and our 1 month old that was hungry, needed a change, and rocking back to sleep. I called him and asked him what the hell was up with that and how unfair that was... his response was that it was quiet in the truck. I'm sure it was. I wound up begging him to come back in the house. I was just at my wits end.

And here I sit today on my husband's day off, with the kids because he is off doing something else and he doesnt seem to care. I love my kids but I need 5 minutes to myself before I go insane. Just 5 minutes. But that is too much to ask. I cant even take the kids to the park or anything because I dont have gas in my car and Matt has the card. So, again, I'm screwed. Yay.

Matt and my brother are off at the house we rent getting stuff from it. Basically, we can no longer afford to stay there. We are loosing our asses left and right. Power is off, before that tv and internet were shut off and the company we went through refused to turn it back on unless we paid out the ass for a month in advance plus a shit load of fees. So that didnt work. The house is just killing us. We need something closer to Caydi's school anyway... so I am praying my mom's husband lets us stay here to save so we can rent another place.